How You Can Reframe The Winter

+ How to stay grounded during the shitstorm from the holidays

Dreams Start With Patience #34

Reading time: 3 minutes

Are you someone who despises the holidays?

I flip-flop every year.

This year - I have a gut feeling this holiday season will be brutal.

Only because of the intense and crazy year we’ve had as a species.

I don’t mind the holidays but I don’t think I’ll ever be the type of person to play Christmas music and obsess over decorating the Christmas tree.

I worry about the individuals who are holiday-season fanatics — why you may ask?

These people embody the spirit of anxiety and depression.

Living in the future in constant anticipation of “joy” and also constantly remembering the mistakes from the past.

All brought forth by the idea of “the holidays” — let’s dissect.

The sun sets earlier in the day.

The temperature drops out of nowhere.

And the weather turns to shit.

This forces us to go inside - the “winter” is usually dreaded by many.

The holiday season gives people something to look forward to during winter.

It makes rational sense.

The more time we spend inside - the less Vitamin D we produce from our interaction with the sun.

We become physically sick due to lack of proactiveness.

But, we become mentally sick from the expectations we place on ourselves to live in anticipation of “Holiday Joy” - and this stems from the compounding of every day spent living in the future or reminiscing on the past.

Why are the holidays so harsh for some and delightful for others?

Some people are capable of detaching their pride and ego from the holiday season.

Others have painful memories causing intense emotions and contributing to a negative world-view of the holiday season.

“End of year consumer” - a phrase used to describe those who can’t show self-control with spending and consumption around the holidays.

The one way to fuck yourself over next year is by making commitments in the heat of the holidays. (debt for gifts, time commitments, and guilt trips from family and friends)

If you can maintain your health during the holiday season — you can make it through with optimal enjoyment.

In the U.S. the holiday season is a wonderful time to reflect on the things and people you love.

It’s also great because you are coming to terms with your human limitations.

Because you will end up having to be selective — this selective nature of the holidays shows you:

Who and what you love and prioritize vs. Who and what you dislike.

Families and friend groups are complex.

There’s no doubt your parents may have absurd views on specific people in the family.

Also, that one sibling might not be favorable — or you have that one friend in your friend group who is a total egotistical ass.

I get it.

In the book, Awareness:

❝

“People tell you, “I think you’re very charming,” so I feel wonderful. I get a positive stroke (that’s why they call it I’m O.K., you’re O.K.). I’m going to write a book someday and the title will be I’m an Ass, You’re an Ass. That’s the most liberating, wonderful thing in the world, when you openly admit you’re an ass. It’s wonderful. When people tell me, “You’re wrong.” I say, “What can you expect of an ass?”

Anthony DeMello

A Scandinavian approach to seasonal depression:

"Hygge" (pronounced "hoo-ga")

This is a practice in the Scandinavian countries.

It’s an incredible perspective on the winter.

A lifestyle about “getting cozy”

The core elements?

A pleasant atmosphere with the people you love — Hygge is about enjoying life, even when it’s fucking cold outside.

The beauty I perceive in this approach is rooted in presence.

Spend time with those you love and indulge in some good food and drinks.

Soft lighting, games, and entertainment.

There is plenty of time to be productive when it’s not cold outside. Life is meant to be enjoyed.

Advice on how to stay grounded in the winter.

  1. Vitamin D3 +k2
    (do your own research)

  2. Warm drinks, with people you love.
    (Bone broth is a game changer for nutrient density)

  3. Detach from the hyper-productive efficiency trap.

  4. Do things just for the sake of doing them.

  5. Create an atmosphere of warmth
    (candles and soft lighting)

  6. Buy a 10,000 lux sunlight lamp
    (stimulates your brain)

  7. Turn off your phone - or use airplane mode
    (it’s time to acknowledge what you are resisting)

Beauty in the routine
wake up earlier
commit to learning more about yourself
and attempt to improve in the areas of life you can control.

Thanks for reading!
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